Every day spent with nature had a powerful calming effect on my mind, body, heart and soul. I felt recharged and reconnected instantly. No phone, computer and contact with my family were retreat orders. By evening of the first night, all our gadgets that connected us to the outside world were asked to be placed in a basket. They weren't locked away, just put aside until the end of our inner work bootcamp. It was quite nice to have no distractions. There were no emails to check, Facebook shares to post, phone calls to make, work to do, cleaning,...etc. Thank goodness the urge to connect inward was more pressing than anything else. Clarity, change, and simplicity demanded my attention.
The meditations I experienced were profound and woke me up from my slumber called life. I didn't think I was doing too bad; yet, the meditations indicated it was time to raise the bar once again. Visions of my purpose were made crystal clear. This was a tremendous gift. At 37 years old, I am completely anchored with a greater knowing of who I am and what I am meant to bring to the world. Most importantly, the collective emotional impact our choices have on our children was imprinted in my soul. What would anyone do with all this information? This is the calling to be my best in order to follow through with the work ahead. Failure is not an option.
I am purposely leaving a lot of my experience out because processing and integration is still happening. It's similar to when a computer is downloading new software. The indicator bar is at maybe 10% which is what is being shared with you in this article. With each download, the program still has to run. I'm not even there yet. Down the road, more will be expressed. There is so much to who we are, why we are here, and the awakening that is happening with everyone. We have barely scratched the surface. The desire is present to go deeper. It's a choice. Awakening is not an easy path to take; however, it can be eased knowing that others have already walked through the terrain. Assisting others to illuminate their hearts and minds is the new role I have taken on. This is the core of healing, living and thriving.
Over the years, I have cultivated my intuition and sensitivities to the subtle information available to all of us. The filters that are a part of our defensive mechanisms only allow a very small portion of this information to come through. If these filters are not in place, we would be feeling and seeing more than we can ever know or comprehend. Our ability to function in the world would be compromised.
Well, these filters fell away during my meditations. I was overwhelmed with so much information that resulted in an emotional out pour of tears that lasted for at least a couple of hours. Another thing about awakening, we must walk through the doorway of feeling and pain. Everything is brought to your awareness - the good, the bad and the ugly. The heart of courage is essential to discern the truth of your nature from the false fears of illusion.
I heard in my heart, "Take care of yourself and you will be able to take care of your children even more. Take care of yourself and you will be able to greatly serve humanity. Do not take care of yourself and you will not be able to do the work you are meant to do."
To know the message first hand, the physical, emotional and mental pain of the children were brought to my attention. The feelings were so real and intense. The mirror was present to show me what it feels like to be in their shoes when the care givers are not present and healthy. The awareness of learned behaviors and unconscious habitual patterns came to the surface as well. Behaviors and patterns past on by great grand parents, parents, caregivers, media, society, family, culture, tradition and so on are the cause to our own imbalances. With that, I had to truthfully look at the unintentional hurt being directed towards my children when mommy puts herself last. The pain was unbearable and magnified. It was more than enough to urge immediate follow through with impeccable commitment and devotion.
The decision to no longer neglect my overall well being as a trade off for being of service to humanity remains. Since the retreat, immediate change has occurred in order to break patterns now. They are stepping stones that will build a solid foundation for the future. The ripple effect these changes will have on my children, world and the generations to come is beyond my imagination. The benefits are endless.
Here are some examples of the changes made in the past two weeks:
- Yoga class every Thursday at Simple Balance.
- Voice lessons every Tuesday night at Vero Voce.
- Homemade green smoothies for breakfast every morning.
- Preparation of healthy snacks and mini meals for myself and my family daily.
- Play time for myself and with my kids.
- Spontaneous date nights with my husband.
- Naps or meditations during the afternoons.
- Journal writing.
- Weekly chiropractic and energetic adjustments to align my mind, body, heart and soul.
- Devoted daily spiritual practice.
- Scheduling work time separate from family time.
Stepping up into my own inner spirit mastery is the highlight of my life's path. Choosing to be even more disciplined with the practice of taking care of me is a way of polishing away the rough edges of the ego. This is just the beginning and more changes are to come. Change that will allow my life to harmonize with my heart.
"I don't have time" has been a running theme all my life. Honoring the messages that were given to me keeps me accountable and responsible to make the time. Distractions have been gradually cut out. The top priorities in life are fully embraced. With that, everything else will fall into place.
I am already seeing the emotional shift with my children. They seem to be my barometers especially when I am not centered, grounded and present. It's a joy to see them happier and more content. And, they've been listening to me more consistently because I am listening to them.
Peace resonates in every aspect of my inner and outer world. I've learned to let go of any expectations and attachment to outcomes. The letting go creates more wiggle room for inspiration to come through and play. If this is just the beginning, I'm curious of "the more" that lies ahead. It's time to take care of you. This is your simple reminder.
The above World Peace Angel painting was created by Joanne Koenig Macko and can be found at the United Nations and The University for Peace in Costa Rica.
"If there is righteousness in the heart, there will be beauty in the character, If there is beauty in the character, there will be harmony in the family home. If there is harmony in the family home, there will be order in the nation.
If there is order in the nation, there will be Peace in the World."
Yours in mind, body and spirit wellness,